>>>>>>>>>>
Originally, I had about 8 paragraphs written about how life is bringing me down at the moment. I had typed about how my time is consumed with school or nothing at all. I started to comment about how hard a long distance relationship is. Deviling deeper, I was brought to think about how my life really isn't how I pictured it when I first began college or, hell, this past school year.
Then I remembered.
It's ok.
It's ok to be down. I can grieve for what could have been. Being angry is not a sin. But more importantly, it's ok, because everything will work out.
Yeah, I might not be where I think I need to be. Things can be falling apart and completely out of control, but God has a plan for me. He knows what I need, and He will deliver. I can be frustrated at not understanding what the hell He has planned. Yet, being frustrated and not having faith are two totally different things.
I have faith that He will take care of me. God will not leave me out to dry whether it's about a summer class or relationships or my future career. But sometimes it's hard to know when or what I should do.
"Oh God, why do you make it so hard?! Why do I feel rotten?," is something that I have found myself crying out lately.
Even though He's already given me the answer (to trust in Him), it doesn't make life a walk in the park all the time. Through it all, I try to remember.
It's ok.
You know that I don't have those specific beliefs, but I think that in a way they are (or should be) universal. Something I've definitely learned this past year is to just let life happen and hope (or pray) that it will all work out in the end. As long as you don't let one single thing bring you down too bad, everything seems to be okay and you can keep your head above the water. It might be incredibly difficult to do sometimes, but it IS possible.
ReplyDelete"I swim for brighter days despite the absence of sun" ~Swim - Jack's Mannequin
~B
Hang in there! Summers are notorious for existential crises. Enjoy the expectant rhythm of the academic calendar while you can ;)
ReplyDeleteThanks guys! I really needed some encouragement and outlook. You da bomb.com
ReplyDeleteB: Great quote and even better advice.
JHo: It's true. I don't know what I'll do when my time is up in academia.
I'm thinking we need to have a Molly Ringwald marathon complete with Haagandaaz ice cream, your blanket, and costume-making.
ReplyDeleteMaybe we can find some awesome vegetarian meal to cook, too...